Thursday, February 27, 2014

Dear Loved Ones-By Susan Thomas

Dear Loved Ones-

To those that have passed- I love you dearly and miss you much. My dear grandparents I miss you so much. I look at my life today and wish you were here to see how far I've come and how I've finally found my happiness. I know you are watching over me, but there are events in my life that just weren't the same without you. I am who I am and over came my hardships because I had your example to look up to. All my precious family who are no longer here my heart will never forget my love for you. My mind may fade with age, but my love for you will always be there even if I can't remember it.
To the family I grew up with- I love you and appreciate you. You helped shape who I am. If it hadn't been for your constant love and support I would have fallen apart. You saved my life just by knowing you loved me and were there for me if I needed your help. I knew I had a father and brother who would do almost anything to protect me. A mother who would do whatever she could to ease whatever I might be going through. It was your love that stopped my thoughts of suicide as a teenager. It was your love that helped guide me back to my faith and happiness. I can't thank you enough for that.
To the family I live with-I love you both. There was a time in life I thought I was destined to live my life alone. I thought I would wind up that old lady with only a dog for company. Not cats because I'm allergic. When I gave up hope for a family of my own my dear husband entered my life. He made me realize people can be trusted and I could have that family. He has helped me rebuild trust in my relationships, strengthened my faith, and made me a better person all around. He forces me to look at myself in a positive way and tells me to stop when I start bashing myself. My dear son has brought me such joy that it is hard to describe. I didn't know I was capable of loving him so much. I didn't think my heart was big enough. He made my heart grow and seeing him over come so many obastacles at such a young age makes me a proud mom. I look forward to watching him grow and helping him become independent and learn right from wrong among other things.
To my new family- I have only known you for about four years, but your love and generosity seems boundless. I felt accepted by you without any problems. When I first met you I was nervous, but you put my nerves at ease with your warm hearts and compassion. The big bear hug I recieved from my father in law made me realize I had nothing to worry about. I can be myself around you without worrying about judgement. I love you all and am proud to call you family.
To my extended family-I love you so much. My cousins were my first friends. Even though we live far apart it is easy to pick up where we left off when see each other once more. It is a joy knowing you and I look forward to seeing you again. To my aunts and uncles you were always good about being a home away from home. Each one of you is unique and each one of you always had something fun to offer. Whether it be fun activites or really awesome food. I could count on you all to help me forget my troubles. To let me be a regular kid instead of that girl with seizures. I love you all. Thank you all for your kindness, compassion, and encouragement.
To my longest friend-You know who you are. Our friendship seems to last the test of time and long distances. I may not always keep in touch but my best wishes and prayers are with you. I can never thank you enough. I have never thanked you for the positive impact you had on my life. You came into my life when I was very angry with the man upstairs. I was so angry with him that if I had the chance I would have strangled him, but your faith was a strong light. Through you I was able to realize I was angry at myself and it just felt better to blame Him. I thank you so much for being a woman of faith that helped me find my way again. I can never thank you enough and I wish you happiness. With upcoming  events I think your happiness is a sure thing.
To all my friends past and present-You all have brought something wonderful to my life in some shape or form. It was your friendships that helped me discover my passions. That helped me form my own opinions. That helped me see the world from different perspectives. I fear if it weren't for you I would be a harsh and judgmental person. Knowing a diverse mixture of people has helped me to try and view the world from different perspectives. You have made the world a much more fascinating place. I care for you all and always hope for the best for all of you. I pray for you all when I feel you may need them or if you pop into my mind during my time with God.
To the almighty father-I have doubted you and cursed your name, but you forgave me and invited me back. Your love and grace continues to amaze me. How you have blessed my life amazes me. I just can't begin to fathom what I did to deserve the wonderful things in my life. You have always been there to help me even when I was being stubborn and independent. You were always there. You knew what I was going through when I tried to hide it from others. You planted thoughts in my heart that I was not capable of that in turn saved my life. I love you and don't deserve your love. All I can do is try my best and hope it is good enough. I may fight you and want my own way, but your way always turns out the best. One of these days I will learn not to fight you so much.

Love all of you always-
Susan

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